I put millions of miles under my heels

As it starts to get colder I feel the need to start Christmas gifts. My dad always wants an "stylin' lid" every year with a fold up brim, and I've finally got the perfect pattern down so I thought I'd share.


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I love it! I finished this sweater last night while fighting a fever and watching old disney movies.

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It's funny that we have an idea of what normal is.  The more I think about it, the more I think it's such a silly idea.  No one is normal.

I say this as I'm practicing something to help deal with my anxiety.  I have a terrible fear of certain bugs, and really feel I need to get over it.  A blogger linked a page of artistically taken pics of various creepy crawlies, and I'm doing what's called graduated exposure.  Basically, I put up the page so that I can see the first picture, and leave it there on my screen until I get over being afraid of it.  Then I move on to the next.  If I start flipping out, I close the window and start again from the top in a few days.  Eventually, if I do it right, I ought to work up to playing with bugs by choice, and then ugly awful things like not hiding from crane flies and centipedes.  And it strikes me...it's not normal to bookmark a page of bug pictures for that purpose.

But no one is normal.  I have a friend from home who is double jointed in pretty much every place you can be.  I have two friends from home who deal with chronic pain.  Another can't see in 3D.  One of my female friends is completely color blind.  Most of us are not 20/20, even though that's regarded as 'normal'.  Another person I know has no left side peripheral vision.  Some friends have chronic back pain.  One with clubbed feet.  One with acid reflux in his mid twenties.  My mom has a spine disorder that has always given her back problems.  I have arch problems, asthma, psoriasis, and a ganglion cyst.

That's just the physical stuff.  I have known very few people who don't struggle from mental issues of one sort or another.  Most of the people I have befriended have turned out to be depressive, bipolar, have anxiety issues, or whatnot.

Apparently I don't know any 'normal' people.  I know this seems like a silly thing to point out, but bear with me.  I've always felt like "I have psoriasis... I'm not like 'normal' people".  Like, in my head there is this ideal normal person, who doesn't have any of the things I've listed so far in this post.  And that is how most people are.  And I find myself being sad that I'm not like them for whatever is the reason of the day. I always thought that most people have 'normal' bodies with 'normal' minds.  I didn't realize that no one is like that.

Anyway yes.  I know it's sort of a silly deep thought.  Deal.  :-P

Got the new AT&T DSL working (no thanks to tech support)! I'd be super ecstatic if U-Verse was available, but for now, the fastest possible DSL will have to do:




One of my friends with U-Verse, FIOS, or a wireless service needs to run these tests and see how they compare. If you have cable internet, post the time of day you run this, and see if around 5 p.m. the speed is any different.

Off to watch Hulu TV!

Sorry for anyone getting this duplicate times, cuz yes, I posted it in a few of my communities.

Does anyone happen to have a pattern for any Bon Jovi symbols? Seriously, any of them. I would love to knit up some cool Jovi stuff be it the heart & dagger, smirk, or anything else. I would love you forever if you could share with me, or point me in the correct direction. I have tried googling it and even checking my favorite knitting sites with no luck.

Thanks!

Take from a member of a Yahoo Newsgroup that I troll around:

Going back to the old ways doesn't mean giving up electricity, homes, and cars. It means living by the same principles, laws, and values that our ancestors lived by. This will allow us to live successfully in today's world. The spirituality our ancestors lived is the same spirituality we need in these modern times. There are too many influences from TV, radio, newspapers, magazines, and negative role models that are guiding our lives in a bad way. Our stability is in the laws, principles, and values that our ancestors were given and that our Elders teach us.

For the longest time since I started knitting I wanted to make a blanket for someone, but was afraid that I would get bored of it, you know? Well, I put that aside and decided to make my great grandmother a shawl/wrap/lap blanket thingamajig for her birthday.

I used size 15 needles and 2 skeins of Inca Organic . The pattern was a simple k1 p2 with 100 stitches. The final dimensions are a bit wonky, 47in by 30in but it made my great grandmother happy and warm, so that's all that matters.

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I'm pretty open about asexuality.  It's easy to be, seeing as how I'm not A.  I try to find places to bring it up, knowing that I will end up answering a lot of personal questions about a community I'm not in.  I try to bring it up, despite knowing just how incredibly detailed and graphic the questions will be.  It might seem prideful, and indeed in the past I didn't feel qualified.  Only an asexual should answer those questions, because only an asexual has that experience.

Thing is, the questions are personal, and graphic.  They are also often antagonistic, meant to convince the A that they aren't in fact A.  People feel entitled to ask just about anything.  Can A's orgasm?  Can male A's get erect?  How come so many date when they don't want sex?  Really, they've never felt sexually attracted to someone (this is almost always asked with a tone of disbelief)?  Haven't they tried hormones?  What do you mean, they don't want hormones...why wouldn't they want sex?  What do they picture when they masturbate?  Why do some of them masturbate at all anyway?  I bet you were sexually abused as a child, and are just in denial about it.

I do understand where the questions come from.  I've wondered the same things, and I know A's have wondered it about each other, because you can find the answers to all of those and more on AVEN.  Put yourself in the shoes of an asexual though.  They've finally figured out why they never understood what sex is all about, and now suddenly strangers in the street are asking them about their sex lives.  It's pretty much constant.  As soon as you bring up asexuality, and speak from some level of authority on the subject, the questions follow.  And that's exactly why I bring it up and answer the questions.

See, the difference is that the questions aren't about me.  I don't have to feel defensive when someone denies that it exists, because they aren't denying my identity.  It's less personal for me, and that makes it easier to keep arguing, keep pushing the point, and keep a clear head doing it.  I know that when someone starts questioning bisexuality there's a strong part of me that wants to go hide under the covers.  It's not like that for asexuality.  I can keep talking, and not be emotionally exhausted from it.  So I do.  I figure, every time I answer some questions about asexuality, that's saving some asexual from having to do it.  I know they get those questions constantly, but maybe my being an advocate can lessen that some for them.  Because I'm not A, because I come from a more recognised orientation, it's easier for me.

So I keep talking about it.  I make it clear that I'm not an expert, and don't understand it all.  I make it clear that there is variability in the community, so I don't speak for all asexuals in my answers.  But I keep talking anyway.  That's a lot of what being an advocate is all about.  Standing up for someone else.  Taking a few punches (or in this case, rudely personal questions) so that they don't have to.  Being educated, and being loud about it, because they shouldn't have to fight it all alone.  It's something I do for asexuality, and it's something I look to do for other groups as I become more educated.

Hi all

I posted on Ravelry earlier about my messy edging, and how it's mainly due to the slip knot I use when casting on becoming loose when i'm knitting into it, despite all my best efforts. Someone suggested I use Meg Swansen's little twist n go method instead of the slip knot. I've googled and looked on youtube but can't find any guidance on how to do this. I've asked the commenter for a brief description on how it's done, and i'm sure she will get back to me but i'm itching to get going with my latest project (a baby jumper). So can anyone here tell me how it's done, or point me in the direction of a tutorial?

Thanks in advance :)